Since it’s that time of year that I am winding my brain down for Christmas, there is just no point starting new projects at this time of year. However, I am working on a fun little project for my own reflection, and I wanted to share. I think the lead up to the new year is a great time for reflection, to look back and appreciate how far life has come on and how much I have grown in a year. I stumbled across this old post and I obviously wrote this while I was feeling judged or inadequate, but the wisest of words come from the darkest of places. Although I can now read this and see only a small glimmer of these feelings, it is still a very valid point that will never get old.
I have been through several stages in my life of flipping between, caring immensely what people thought of me to not giving a damn. To now, where I don’t want to care, and mostly I don’t, but sometimes I just can’t help it the feels creeping in, and I have to have a mental word with myself.
“Truth is, what other people think of you is NONE of your business.”
Looking back to my childhood, I have always had issues with acceptance and rejection. My dad left us (Me my mum and my two brothers) when I was 6 (my brothers 2 & 1) and after very little contact and ten years later, at the age of 16 he wrote me a letter and told me he wanted nothing more to do with me, and that he wanted to get on with his new life with his new wife, and he didn’t want his old life to get in the way. Naturally this has had a deep seated effect on the way I have lived my life and the way I am today. I am a people pleaser. I want people to like me and I worry a lot about facing that rejection again. Still, my default emotion to getting to know new people, is to think they don’t like me.
I think it is important to be aware of what other people may think of your actions, other wise the world would be full of ‘I-dont-give-a-fuck’ arseholes, and there’s enough of them out there. However, if you are anything like me, you need to have a word with yourself about how you let other peoples opinions (or what you think their opinions are) affect you. Seeking approval from everyone is a waste of time and energy and it’s only you that suffers by dwelling on it. The fact of the matter is, there will always be people out there that like you, and there will be people that don’t, unfortunately it is the way of the world. The perception people have of you, says more about them than it does you.
Once you realise it doesn’t matter what people think of you, you can be free to be who you want to be. Life isn’t a practise run and you have to make the most of it #YOLO!! It isn’t about staying beige to please everyone, it is about finding the people that LOVE the pink (or turquoise, lilac or what ever other colour represents your freedom!)
In the famous word of Bob, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy!”